Clueless

You have no idea
About how regretful I am
For believing you
For trusting you

You have no idea
About how dissapointed I am
For being fooled
For being taken so easy
For being lifted to the sky
Then drowned to a bottomless pond aftermath

Still wanna build your tower of hope up high, while in fact no dream left to be granted?
Still wanna spit white lies, while in fact she already figured it out?

You're a one clueless man living surrounded by tons of alibi
Which could be delivered nicely to someone who's near

to be read or not to be read

Hey, please do laugh, I miss your chuckle
Hey, please do sing, I miss your hum
Hey, please do talk, I miss your voice

I'm sorry if I've acted like kids. Doing something deleterious, in order to get your attention. I've tried that before, and that was not a good idea afterall,but still..... Guess if I'm a childish

I'm sorry if I have no words to say the time when you ask me 'why', it is always been the time I lose the reasons I've prepared before. Guess if I have a gold-fish's memory bank

Tons of sorry if I've ever hurted your feelings by showing a stolid face. I'm not good at expressing my emotions. Guess if I'm an asperger victim

Pardon my words, if it always looks like I'm blaming you, I'm not, I just try to break the ice between us

And I swear. For god's sake I swear, I regret what I've done. And I still love you wholeheartly. One more, what can you expect from a 16 years old lady who can't even get a 90 in math? Who can't even treat you well like the other girls do? But at least, I talk no lie, te amo, mi querido. And I'm sorry

The night without our smileys and 'goodnight, sleep well, and have a nice dream' was the night when I curled and did what the women usually do at their most miserable moment.
Transformed.........I was way too easy to be turned into a somber lassie.

Is at the lowest level of self-confidence

what should I do? world sucks

a piece of clutter

worth-crying?
I cried a lot and being a somber-junk during these 2 weeks but at the end I just didn't know the reason why I cried.
Did I cry for myself? Did I cry for you? Did I cry for somebody else out there?
Here, I'm trying out to find out. Let me just spit them out

1.
I live with pressures from both of my parents just because I'm the only child and I can't do anything but pretend to be strong and able to carry on.
Having a mom whose life is depending on the very expensive medicines, dad whose very asian-- I'm emphasizing on the strictness and very particular about not giving up, are not that easy and it forced me to do hundreds time heavier weights than normal people..
I'm feeling like I'm being a beast of burden, carrying too much weights on my shoulders--correction : we, X5. We got 2 curriculums which we have to balance each another, the national and international. They made it harder for us to concentrate to our chosen major, didn't they?
As a kid, we swallow every single words and nod to every single order. We did protest. But what are we?

2.
This includes my personal social-life. Am I being too sensitive? Or am I being too kind to you?

3.
Something

4.
Something that's even more negligible

HELPING HANDS

without several distractors&loveable peeps, i will really get extremely bored to death of my daily routines. It's all wake up-shower-school-course-home-sleep-repeat. seeing from the facts that i'm the only child, it's pretty impossible to go out every saturday and chill out.
last 2 weeks were the climax. i got all messed up and lack of sleep. But i did get a lot of helping hands.
Friends&Boyfriend did sway away my drowsiness-- even if i showed up and yawned all the time in the morning. At last, they were all succeeded in pulling up the corner of my lips, forming a smile or even a grin.

i don't hate the fact that i am the dumbest kid when it comes to Science. i got my drawing skills in return

Long Live History&Geo!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

made an icon, a bit creepier than usual. watch out for the eyeballs moving

A TURNING POINT

When Dad went rage after seeing my IGCSE report card, he, for all of the almighty god & goddesses, has vowed to seize my whole facilities--computer, cellphone, and all the gadgets. Pretending to be a little bit ignorant about the chaos, i decided to participate in the HETADAY 2010 at La Porchetta Grand Indonesia, 24 october 2010. GOD BLESS THE HETAFANS!

hey, my EX-fella

i just wanna contribute my recent feelings of you, be calm, yea?

well, i'm terribly sorry about 'what happened' to us several weeks ago. and now i just wanna say that i don't care anymore about EVERYTHING about your lovelife, your acts, your things. that doesn't mean i just say 'YES' and forgive whatever you've done. to forgive someone doesn't mean to forget about what has happened. cheer up :)

Stunned Me Baby One More Time

promote DRAMA ENGINE. this is a project with my friend, SHABEEKA who is trully an amazing photographer and doodle artist. and maudy, your freaky friend will be the model.
Finally I got my own freedom! I’ve graduated from LIA’s High Intermediate 4. even so, I miss my fellas.. I feel feckless guys, I got my art block and I couldn’t think of any ideas which are satisfying. It’s like the days is reiterating over the same things.
Do you guys know where can I buy a pair of black ankle boots? NOT THE EXPENSIVE ONE. One more thing, Honda kiku, together with ivan braginski is intoxicating my soul! yea i'm a hetalia freak, call me that way

STOP CANADIAN'S SEAL SLAUGHTER

we're innosence
does it make sense?
we even don't give any offense

but you did it
you'll never be satisfied before we get killed
we don't understand anything 'till our last breath

how many cuts should you repeat?
how many fate should we accept?
does it have an end?

please stop canadian seal slaughter
please don't get us into suffer
your love can make us happier and better





































we deserve to live too ..

I LOVE ; LOVE

VIN DIESEL




























TAYLOR MOMSEN





























ROBERT PATTINSON





















SHIA LABEOUF






































can't wait for BLEACH MOVIE 3 : FADE TO BLACK ! and also, last night, i almost got into the accident in GALAXY. just thank god, we're okay.
that motorcycle jumped onto the car *not my car, but it was right in front of my car and we saw it clearly! mom screamed histerically , while i wanted to get out and punched the stupid girl who was crushing the motorcycle in the face!

Weird, huh? nope, It's just the Style

saras, salah satu besties gue baru beli anjing mini pincher baru, nama nya moel sikebas ,sikebas itu singkatan sigit(bokap-nya saras),sekar(nyokapnya saras), bagas(kakak nya saras),saras.aneh? emang, tapi biarin deh.
kasian.
della(besties gue juga) kamarnya dipasang wallpaper miki mos. dia juga girang. oh, della. gue? oh, gue masih harus bersabar sampe lebaran kucing ato sampe manusia mengupil menggunakan jempol kaki.

as we talk about different topic, beberapa dari schoolmates gue beranggapan kalo poni belah tengah itu agak 'weird',no offense buat yg poni nya belah ditengah. but they'll say a BIG NO to PONI BLEAH TENGAH. gue sih iya-iya aja. entah mereka udah tau apa belom kalo dirumah dulu poni gue terbelah tepat ditengah. sekarang gue mengakali dengan menjepit poni gue, ciattt.

tapi buat yang mukanya cocok-cocok aja sih poni belah tengah is their passion! kaya kalo orang bule kan jarang tuh yang pake poni. rata-rata poni mereka PBT (poni belah tengah) ,daaann, COCOKK! tapi kenapa harus anti banget PBT kalo lo pe-de. bayangkan poni mu yang terbelah jika tertiup angin, rasakan sensasi nya! sensasi dingin-dingin geumeushyin! Oh my god!
most of them, used a side fringe to their hair, well, that's their style.


















AND I LOVE ; LOVE ; LOVE TAYLOR'S HAIR!!






















final exam is coming up, closer ,and we all hate that stuff!
study will be number one and all the play time will be gone ,shit :(

Bing Bang Busy

Wi-Fi gue tumbang, iya, adaptor nya kebakar gara-gara gue 'on'-in terus. akhirnya bentuk nya jadi gak karuan seperti dubur yg baru keluar dari tempat nya bernaung.









laptop gue juga bernasib sama,bedanya dia tuh jadi lemoot banget, bahkan kura-kura buntung bisa lebih cepet dari dia. gue klik mozilla , keluarnya baru sejam setelah mozilla itu diklik, o mi god.

jadi sekarang kehidupan gue bergantung pada komputer gue di ruang komputer.
it is going to be worse if this computer has some troubles too,so we all hope that this computer won't go down--it's just me actually who pray for this thingy :P
gue pengen pengen banget hp baru sm iPod nano. oh god, kemaren hp gue ketumpahan minyak yg berasal dari bekal sekolah gue di dalem tas, skrg layar nya item-item gitu kena minyak. hebat banget yang naro.

oh, that was horrible. setelah gue terseok-seok ngejalanin hari jahanam ini akhirnya gue dapet libur, minggu depan kakak-kakak kelas 9 UN jadinya kita yang kelas 8 'belajar dirumah' alias 'libur'. maklum juga ,adek sepupu gue yang lucu-lucu itu ngajakin gue nginep di rumah mereka, besties gue-MAJAS minta kita pergi ke dufan pas tanggal 27, temen-temen SD gue ngajakin reunian di tebet, oh chill, it's gotta be someone's dying right now! :0

REFRESH YOUR SOUL

Precious from My Previous

GOT FRIENDSIGN FROM MY ELEMENTARY SCHOOL-TIME BESTIES , NANDA








saking semangat nya pake drawing tools di messenger, dia sempet-sempet nya nulis I ♥ MAUDY di situ ngaha, nanda hebat !

LOVE YOU TOO THIS BIIIIIIIIIIIIIG , NAN ! ♥

The First

nah, postingan pertama, blog pertama, bingung mau nulis apa. karna baru bangun juga otak belom muter. masih ngumpulin nyawa pagi-pagi gini, rambut gue masih kribo, mata gue masih garis, badan gue masih bungkuk, muka gue masih ancur *bukan nya emang dari sana nya udah ancur?*. dan kebiasaan jelek lain yang gue lakuin setelah baru bangun tidur masih rahasia alam. sshh.
yang jelas, gue - maooking'sthesupershit, punya tampang seperti disamping *yah, gue tau foto itu memperlihatkan gue saat lagi mengernyit mirip badut bekantan di ancol *
akan mulai ber-blog di sini. yehaa.
Akhir-akhir ini entah baru bangun tidur, atau mau tidur kaki gue sering kram alias 'kram' atau apalah itu. pokonya kram adalah saat dimana otot kaki kaya ketarik gitu, dan yang pasti sakiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit banget ! kram nya gue tuh kram yang sakit banget sampe ga bisa gerak *semua kram kan juga sakit*. sampe gue lagi tidur sekitar jam 2an kram, lagi dikamar mandi kram juga, lagi makan di meja makan pun kram, o-mi-god
nah, gue udah ga tahan lagi kram kaya gini terus. gue ga mau gue lagi nongkrong di kamar mandi dan tiba" kram. oohh, ga nyaman banget !

pokonya berhubung ini postingan pertama gue jadi gue mungkin masi kaku dalam ber-blog, masi jarang ngepost juga mungkin. tapi gue akan usahain nge post sesering mungkin.